Frostynins
by The-Reject-Crayon
Summary: When sand meets snow, who knows what crazy things can happen. Gaara and others are on a vacation to a mountain ski resort, and things just have to go wrong...
1. Chapter 1

This will be an ongoing crackish fic told from Gaara's point of view. I haven't decided on an ending yet though... -sweatdrop-

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. If I did, do you really think I'd be here?

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Why he had agreed to be dragged off on this stupid trip, Gaara would never know. He and his teammates, also his siblings, had been invited on a week long trip to a ski resort high in the mountains. In the cold, unforgiving, frozen mountains… Not exactly his ideal vacation spot.

But he had been dragged there nonetheless, Temari nagging and complaining until he was too annoyed to deny her anymore.

And so now he found himself staring out of a frosted over window, shivering and feeling pissed off. The cold didn't help his already grumpy personality, and neither did the fact that most of the Konoha-nin were also on the trip. The last thing he wanted was the cold doubled with a bunch of annoying rookies. He would never get a moment's peace with Naruto nagging him every second of every hour of every day.

He was bundled up in a million layers of clothing and blankets, something unheard of for someone who came from the desert. For some reason, his siblings seemed perfectly at ease with only a ski jacket and pants. Unbelievable.

Gaara shared a cabin with Kankurou and Temari, while the rest of the Konoha-nin shared cabins with their respective teams. To his utter dismay, Naruto's cabin was located on his right, with Lee's cabin to his left.

Naruto was one matter, but there was also Sasuke… The sand-nin still held a certain dislike for him, and things would most likely not go well if they were to meet again. Heaven forbid they have another Chuunin Exam event… Gaara cringed at the thought.

Temari's voice recalled him from is thoughts.

"Gaara, we're going over to the Hall to have a get together party. You're coming." she stated matter-of-factly.

Gaara only glared at her. The Hall was a large building about the size of three cabins located to the south of the cabins, a short walk downhill, where the vacationers gathered to eat and chat.

"But that would require me actually getting up and going _outside_." he responded, his voice as cold as the wind blowing outside of the cabin.

Temari was not put off. She folded her arms and stared down at her brother menacingly, something she rarely did, and narrowed her eyes.

"Gaara…" she said slowly. "I made you go through all of the trouble of coming here with us. You might as well have some fun while you're here. So won't you come?" This was clearly not a question, but a demand, and a serious one at that. One that if not carried out, punishment would follow.

Trying not to look as though he were giving in, but failing miserably, Gaara stood up, grumbling. "It's too cold…" was all he could manage to come up with for an argument, and Temari ignored it. Instead, she tossed him a black ski jacket and some boots.

"Get those on and we'll get going. Kankurou's already down there, so hurry up." she commanded him, and Gaara could only sigh in defeat.

It wouldn't be long before all of the trouble would begin.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter two! Here we go!

Disclaimer: Me? Own Naruto? Certainly not.

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If the walk through the ankle deep snow in the middle of a snowstorm was bad, it didn't even compare to the Hall.

After nearly freezing to death, Gaara was horrified to find that the Hall was packed with the biggest bunch of idiots he had ever had the misfortune to lay eyes upon.

All of the genin from the chuunin exams were there, plus more, talking loudly, eating, and other pointless merriment. And, with his luck, the first of those idiots to notice him was none other than Uzumaki Naruto.

It wasn't that he didn't like the blonde kid. Though Gaara would never admit it, he really owed him big time. And, truth be told, he had been secretly looking forward to meeting him on the trip, one of the reasons he eventually gave in to Temari's nagging.

But the first moment that the Uzumaki idiot saw him, he broke out into a stupid grin, ran over to him, and _hugged_ him. No joke. Hugged. If that wasn't enough, he started talking on and on about pointless things that started to drive Gaara insane. It had taken all of his willpower not to strangle him to shut up.

And now the blonde boy was giving him the same stupid grin as if they'd been best friends forever, and started to make his way through the crowd towards him.

Something like a growl rumbled in Gaara's throat. Temari glanced at him.

"Play nicely." she hissed to him. Gaara growled again, but Naruto was already upon him.

"Gaara! I didn't think you'd come!" he exclaimed loudly, drawing the attention of everyone in the room. Things went quiet as everyone waited for his answer. No pressure or anything.

"It's not like I had any choice…" he mumbled, but Naruto didn't seem hear him, though the others within listening distance could sense his annoyance. People started getting squirmy, which only added to his annoyance.

Everywhere he went, people did the same thing. Scared glances, whispering behind his back… Whenever Temari sent him out to do the shopping, may she forever rest in hell, people would stop whatever they were doing and just stare at him. Of course, they only did so when they thought he wasn't looking, but when you have access to a third eye, it's not very hard to miss.

Of course, being feared had its advantages. He often got to cut in line without even trying, and sometimes he even got free groceries. The thought made him want to grin.

Naruto's voice yanked Gaara out of his thoughts. "Come on over here, Sasuke and Hinata are waiting." The blonde boy said grinning, and grabbed Gaara's arm.

"Wait, no, I'd rather not-" Gaara started.

"Come on!" Naruto dragged him over into the corner where an expressionless Sasuke and a blushing Hinata awaited them.

As the two approached, Sasuke stared at them. He and Gaara hadn't yet spoken since the chuunin exam events, and Gaara didn't particularly want to.

"Hey guys, I brought Gaara!" Naruto said happily, shoving Gaara out in front of him to face the others.

Hinata blinked, looking terrified. "Umm… H-hello…" she stuttered and seemed to slink over to hide behind Naruto. Sasuke, however, just stared at him.

Gaara stared back unblinking, pondering whether or not he should just kill him now. But Temari's unspoken threats still lingered in his mind, and he decided against it. Best let the Uchiha speak first.

As neither spoke and the tension rose, Hinata started getting squirmy. "Um… S-sorry, Naruto, but… I-I have to go…" she said, and without another word, fled.

An awkward silence followed, and Naruto shifted nervously from foot to foot. At last, Sasuke spoke.

"You're an idiot for letting Naruto drag you around like that." he said coolly.

Gaara's eye twitched. Suddenly he was starting to rethink not killing him.

It seemed as though this night might not be so easily endured after all.


	3. Chapter 3

Finally got the third chapter up. Sorry it took so long; I was very unmotivated. Hopefully I'll get to work on this more.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.

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Although he would have very much liked to crush the Uchiha bastard with his sand at that moment, there were several problems. For one, there was no sand to crush him with; Temari had made sure of that. And then of course, there would be Temari to deal with afterwards, and even Gaara wasn't willing to face his sister's wrath.

Instead, he took a deep breath, glared at Sasuke, and turned around to leave.

Naruto instantly reacted.

"Oi, Gaara! Where are you going? Don't let Sasuke get on your nerves! He does that to everyone!" the boy called after the retreating sand-nin.

Ignore him. Just ignore him. Yes, that was what he'd do. Even Naruto should be wise enough to not chase after an extremely pissed off Gaara. He hadn't taken more than a few steps away before the Uchiha's comment made him stop.

"Forget it, Naruto. That sand chicken just doesn't want to risk losing in a fight against me. Again." Sasuke said with a smirk on his face.

"You…" Gaara's head slowly turned towards the konoha ninja, clear wrath and bloodlust on his face. He would have then proceeded to strangle him if a hand had not come out from nowhere and pulled him away.

Gaara couldn't see who it was who was dragging him away from the konoha ninjas, but he had a few guesses to who it might be.

"Hey there, Gaara, you came! I bet Temari you wouldn't." Kankurou said as he dragged Gaara to another side of the Hall.

Gaara wrinkled his nose; his brother smelled strongly of alcohol, and was clearly drunk. Oh goodie. Bad things happened when Kankurou got hold of the brain numbing liquid.

His brother continued. "You playing nicely? Cuz you know what Temari would do t'you if you did anythin'."

His words were slurred slightly, showing that it hadn't been just one drink, but several. Kankurou could drink all night, at the cost of losing his mind halfway through. Then he became drunk-Kankurou, a wild man who liked to hit on women and play strip poker.

Gaara was led against his will to Kankurou's drinking buddies in the corner.

A rosy cheeked Anko looked up, squinted at him, then spat on the floor. "Yo, kiddo." she said with a grin.

Neji was passed out in a chair next to her, while Jiraiya and Tsunade were having their own contest to see who would pass out first. Tsunade, Gaara noticed with embarrassment, seemed to have played, and lost, a game of strip poker earlier, seeing as she was missing everything but her bra and underpants. He would never see the Hokage the same way again.

Gaara gave a long sigh and turned away from the Fifth Hokage, blushing slightly. "Kankurou, my punishment for killing any of those rookie morons would be nothing compared to how much Temari is going to punish you for getting this drunk again." he said, ignoring the two sannin insulting each other behind him.

Kankurou gave a wild, booming laugh, and Gaara knew he wasn't listening to him. He'd probably been drinking for a while now. "What're you talking 'bout? What she don't know won't hurt 'er." he said, still chuckling at his brother's foolishness.

Gaara almost rolled his eyes. "She's going to find out, like she always does."

Kankurou's smile vanished, replaced by a scowl worthy of a three-year-old that wasn't getting his way. "Yer not gonna tell 'er, are you? Don't let 'er find out!"

"Find out about what?" a menacing voice spoke from behind Kankurou. An extremely pissed Temari stood behind the drunk puppet master, eyeing him with anger and disgust.

Kankuoru slowly turned around to look at his enraged sister. "Um, hello, Temari."

Gaara couldn't help but to smirk. "Told you so…"

* * *

Ha, what will Temari do about Kankurou? Find out next time.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter four! This story is finally getting somwhere!

I'm going to try and update about once a week. Then I might actually finish sometime soon.

So, I hope you like!

Disclaimer: Same as always. No owning...

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Kankurou was going to die. Gaara was pretty sure of this.

And as he stared at the demonic expression on Temari's face, who _wouldn't_ think that they were going to have to prepare a funeral for the puppet master?

"H-h-hello, Temari…" Kankurou stuttered, suddenly not as drunk as he had been a few seconds ago.

"Having fun, Kankurou?" Temari asked, a creepy smile plastered on her face.

"Y-yeah, well, these nice people here invited me to, um, hang out with them. T-they offered me some, well…"

"You'd better start running now." Gaara commented, counting down the seconds before Temari went berserk with rage.

And with that, the older sand-nin was sprinting away as fast as he possibly could.

Of course, with Kankurou gone, Temari had no one to turn to other than Gaara.

"Did you know about this?" his sister hissed, looking more like a demon than a ninja.

"No. He'd just kidnapped me and dragged me over here." Gaara said calmly. He knew that if he acted this way, Temari wouldn't unleash her rage upon him. And he was right.

Temari calmed down a bit. "Okay, but when you see him again, I want you to drag him, begging for his life, to me." she ordered.

Gaara almost smiled. "Will do." Best to just agree with anything she says. Keeps you out of most kinds of trouble.

"Good. Now go play with some kids your age, alright?" she said, giving the drunk party behind them a disapproving look.

Gaara would have sighed and complained if he had thought he was out of the danger zone just yet. "Fine." Sometimes Temari sounded more like his mother than his older sister.

And with that, Temari stomped off to go find her prey…

Now that she was gone, Gaara sighed and looked around. There was nothing here for him to do. No one to terrorize without Temari finding out. He might as well go back to the cabin…

But wait? Of course!

Gaara was delighted by the idea. With Temari gone, no longer watching his every move, he would be free to sneak back to the cabin where he could be alone with the wonderful silence of his own company.

Of course, he would have to brave the snow again, and the storm seemed to be picking up, but if he rushed, he might only be half frozen by the time he got back.

And this was exactly what Gaara decided to do. Sneaking to the back door of the Hall, his many layers of clothing tightly secured around him, he slipped out of the warm, noisy building out into the freezing cold snowstorm outside…

And had he stayed any second longer, he would have heard the radio that rested on the table near the exit advise everyone to stay put where they were and not go outside, for the fierce blizzard that was on its way…

And then he may not have got caught in the middle of it.

* * *

Dun dun dun! Gaara+snowbad.

Stay tuned for the next chapter!


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